Making Unique Observations in a Very Cluttered World

Friday, 10 August 2012

'JPM's $150 Billion FDIC Reality Adjustment' - Just Admitted To The World JPM's Assets Are Overvalued By $150 Billion -

'JPM's $150 Billion FDIC Reality Adjustment' - Just Admitted To The World JPM's Assets Are Overvalued By $150 Billion - 

JPM’s $150 Billion FDIC Reality Adjustment

Reuters published an exclusive story this morning

U.S. banks told to make secret plans for preventing collapse
Buried in the final paragraph:

In a presentation in March, JPMorgan Chase said it had a recovery plan in place and said it was ordered by regulators. The presentation was organized by Harvard Law School and was closed to the media at the time, but is now available online.

Here’s the BEST part of the JPM document.

It’s easy to see on the PDF:


Go to page 9.  Under the wipeout scenario JPM describes a $50 billion trading loss turning into a $200 billion loss as soon as the FDIC takes over.  Why… ? Because JPM says they would expect the FDIC to immediately writedown JPM’s assets by an additional $150 billion.

Holy mark to bullshit.  Jamie Dimon just admitted to the world that JPM is mis-marking assets to the tune of $150 billion.

It gets better. Go to page 10.  The chart shows that they only have $184 billion in equity, minus the $50 billion loss, minus ‘the $150 billion fdic reality adjustment’, which leaves them in a negative equity position of (-$16 billion).

So, we can extrapolate that without this phantom loss of $50 billion, JPM’s real equity position is just $34 billion currently, not the $184 billion on their books.

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Study: Oral Sex Cures Morning Sickness - ingest the father’s semen to build up a tolerance to what’s already in her -

Study: Oral Sex Cures Morning Sickness - ingest the father’s semen to build up a tolerance to what’s already in her - 

Pregnant women have used natural remedies such as a teaspoon of ginger or a mint to help battle morning sickness. But now, one medical professional believes you can add oral sex to that list.

According to Gordon Gallup, a psychologist at SUNY-Albany, the best way to cure morning sickness during pregnancy is sperm.

But not just any sperm, it should be the sperm of the person who got you pregnant.

Gallup believes the reason a pregnant woman gets morning sickness is due to the unfamiliar semen in their body due to the pregnancy.

Gallup says in his findings that the woman’s body will initially reject the father’s semen as an infection and react to it by vomiting.

Gallup says the best cure for morning sickness is to ingest the father’s semen so her body can build up a tolerance to what’s already in her body.

Gallup agrees with the 2000 abstract from the National Center for Biotechnology Information, which showed that oral sex and swallowing sperm is correlated with a diminished occurrence of preeclampsia.

PubMed Health defines preeclampsia as when a pregnant woman develops high blood pressure and protein in the urine after the 20th week, which is usually in the late second or third trimester of pregnancy.


In Israel, new modesty glasses for Orthodox Jewish men blur women out of their line of sight -

In Israel, new modesty glasses for Orthodox Jewish men blur women out of their line of sight - 

It’s the latest prescription for extreme ultra-Orthodox Jewish men who shun contact with the opposite sex: Glasses that blur their vision, so they don’t have to see women they consider to be immodestly dressed.
In an effort to maintain their strictly devout lifestyle, the ultra-Orthodox have separated the sexes on buses, sidewalks and other public spaces in their neighborhoods. Their interpretation of Jewish law forbids contact between men and women who are not married.
Walls in their neighborhoods feature signs exhorting women to wear closed-necked, long-sleeved blouses and long skirts. Extremists have accosted women they consider to have flouted the code.
Now they’re trying to keep them out of clear sight altogether.
The ultra-Orthodox community’s unofficial “modesty patrols” are selling glasses with special blur-inducing stickers on their lenses. The glasses provide clear vision for up to a few meters so as not to impede movement, but anything beyond that gets blurry — including women. It’s not known how many have been sold.
For men forced to venture outside their insular communities, hoods and shields that block peripheral vision are also being offered.
The glasses are going for the “modest” price of $6.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/israel-new-modesty-glasses-orthodox-jewish-men-blur-women-line-sight-article-1.1133397

28-year-old woman has developed a condition where fingernails grow from the hair follicles all over her body -

28-year-old woman has developed a condition where fingernails grow from the hair follicles all over her body - 

Shanyna Isom has consulted every possible specialist, including a doctor in the Netherlands, but she still as no idea what is wrong with her.
The 28-year-old beautician and former University of Memphis law student has developed a condition so severe, fingernails grow from the hair follicles all over her body.
"Black scabs were coming out of her skin," said her mother, Kathy Gary. "The nails would grow so long and come out and regrow themselves. They are hard to touch and stick you."
The disease so far has affected not only her skin, but her bones and her vision. Because Isom is unable to walk without a cane, her mother helps her out of bed each day.
Doctors at Johns Hopkins Medical Center in Baltimore, where Isom is being treated, told her family that she is the only person in the world with this unknown condition.
And now she has $500,000 in unpaid medical bills. Isom has state insurance, but it doesn't cover medical care in Maryland. Her mother lost her job as a medical receptionist because she looks after her daughter at home, so savings have dried up.
Once a month, mother and daughter travel to Baltimore from Memphis to monitor her treatment.
But now, Isom has put all of her energy into creating the S.A.I. Foundation (so named for her initials) to help others with mystery illnesses.
Bank of America has agreed to take donations at any of their branch offices. Friends have organized fundraisers, and her high school has dedicated a football game to her charity.
Despite her debilitating illness, Isom told ABCNews.com, "I don't know whether to smile or cry. I am very blessed."
On her blog, Pray for Shanyna, she laments: "It has taken all of my hair out and has left my body with scabs all over it, plus I have lost about 200 pounds. Two years ago, I was a healthy woman on my own ... had big dreams and goals that I was following until one day my body completely shut down on me."
Isom was a junior studying criminal justice when the mystery illness first occurred in September 2009, according to WLBT in Memphis, which first reported the story.
She went to an emergency room for an asthma attack and was given a large dose of steroids, which doctors suspected caused an allergic reaction.
After returning home, Isom began itching. Doctors prescribed Benadryl, but it got worse.
"It was uncontrollable and we didn't know what it was," said her mother.
Soon, her legs turned black.
"It looked as if she had been in a house fire and gotten burned," said Gary.
Doctors thought she had eczema or a staph infection and prescribed drugs, but it got worse. Meanwhile, all tests came back negative.
"We could not figure out what was going on," said her mother. "She was just breaking out everywhere. Her body was scabbed all over."
At the same time, Shanyna was losing 10 to 15 pounds a week. A bone marrow biopsy turned up nothing.
It was then her Memphis doctor threw up his hands.
"He said she would be like that for the rest of her life," said Gary. "But I couldn't accept that."
Isom and her family persisted, and in August 2011, Shanyna went to Johns Hopkins.
There, doctors determined that she was producing 12 times the number of skin cells in each hair follicle. Instead of growing hair, the follicles were producing human nails.


Washington DC man orders a Television from Amazon and gets Assault Rifle Instead -

Washington DC man orders a Television from Amazon and gets Assault Rifle Instead - 

It's not yet clear how it happened, but a Washington, D.C., musician who ordered a flat-screen TV through Amazon received a military-style assault rifle instead.

Seth Horvitz ordered the 39-inch Westinghouse TV last week through one of Amazon's third-party vendors, WTTG-TV reported. On Tuesday, UPS left a smaller box at his apartment in northeast D.C. The 38-year-old electronic musician told The Washington Post he thought the seller had sent him a stand for the set.

Inside, Horvitz found a black, semiautomatic Sig Sauer SIG716, similar to the M16, which U.S. forces have carried for 50 years, and the AR-10. The SIG716 is used by law enforcement and the military.

"I was confused as to how that kind of mix-up could happen," he told the Post. "It surprised me to see how easy it would be for a gun to show up on someone's doorstep — not just a gun, but an assault weapon."

The box had two mailing labels: one with his name and address, the other for a Pennsylvania gun store that had ordered it from a supplier. Neither the gun store nor the supplier was identified.

Horvitz notified the sender and called D.C. police. He told the Fox station the two officers who responded "were a little confused at first; they've never seen anything quite like it."

"They just took my information and then said we'll handle this weapon because it's illegal to keep here. It's illegal to transport in a car, so it can't be returned."

On Deadline has asked Amazon whether it has determined how the mix-up occurred and whether it has any policies covering gun purchases. We'll update if we get answers.

Read more -